The College considers the essay the vital component in the selection of students. In the space provided or on a separate sheet, tell us something about your past experiences, present and future goals, and how Flagler College fits into these goals. Be sure to stay on topic and to write a carefully considered, grammatically correct essay.
In the contemporary world, excellence rarely surfaces in individuals, replaced by mediocre efforts on the part of the individuals and less-than-distinct qualities, smothered by the ingrained teachings of tutors in modern schools to conform, perfect, and succeed to further the prestige of the educator, rather than the pupil.
I myself experienced first-hand the dire effects of such a practice, trying to perform my best, and yet worked hard despite the pre-set molds of the perfect little student my elementary and middle school instructors endeavored to force I and my peers. Rather than conform to the standard the tutors of the school deemed the only possible way for a student to gain favor in their eyes, I formed myself in a different manner, and transformed into my own unique persona, rather than the common one several of my prior teachers attempted to meld me into.
Despite my lack of friends, I instead turned to books and reading, furthering my education by tenfold over the years and rapidly expanding my cache of vocabulary and literary terms, and steadily advancing far ahead of my peers in terms of reading and writing ability, endeavoring to perfect my skills in both regards.
In time, I befriended a precious few people, one of whom suffered death from an unfortunate accident around the time she celebrated her thirteenth birthday, and I my fifteenth; we mirrored each other in friendship and personality so much that her passing affected me deeply, and in turn I developed a wise, sensitive view of the world, and occurrences in it. My diagnosis of Asperger’s Syndrome in the following years only served to increase my enlightenment, analytical writing and thinking process, and awareness of the world, in addition to my sensitivity to it; I knew that my mind worked and functioned differently than others’, but the cause now explained why.
The excellent writing skills and flamboyant creativity once thought to be genetic and inherited from one or both of my parents, now stemmed from the fact that my brain process differed from others of my age, in some respects far greater in skill, and in others, less, also accounting for my emotional, passionate nature and love of drama and the arts. Throughout the years, I worked to improve my acting skills, and from an early age, I easily measured up to my instructors’ standards, even meriting the lead in one of the summer productions at an arts camp I attended, and positions in several school plays.
Though, again, discouragement of students who experienced trouble melding into the typecast mold of my previous educational institution in turn discouraged me from pursuing acting again until my senior year of high school, I never gave up my goal of one day mastering the arts of acting, drama, literature, and writing. In the following years, at my high school, my skills reached their highest peak so far, developing and improving rapidly with the introduction of the pastime of reading, studying, and reviewing others’ online writing and works, both in class, and on a personal basis, and writing beautiful literary works highly rated by other students, teachers, and strangers alike.
The art of writing came easily to me, proving more akin to breathing, easy and effortless, and yet more enjoyable than any other venue I encountered in my entire time spent within the halls of school, and by seeking to join the Flagler College community, I hope to add my venerable skills to the impressive myriad of creative talent present there.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
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Impressive essay, it definitely feels like you've summed up your past experience in a concise manner. I would be a bit wary of lauding myself so strongly, of course that might just be me, I don't enjoy promoting myself and I suppose colleges do want bold people. That aside you do write well and the essay did flow well. I enjoyed your outlook on the typecasting of students in todays society, High school especially. You spice up the writing with numerous adjectives which is always a good touch, no one wants to read essays with few adjectives. All in all nice essay and I hope Flagler feels the same way.
ReplyDeleteAmber - I am glad you love reading and writing so much. It warms my heart of course. I am interested in limiting the focus somewhat. I am really interested in knowing how Aspergers helped out your creativity. I definitely agree with you in terms of the limits of the school institution, so I think the organization of the essay works well in terms of what comes first, but I would like to know those specifics and in including those details, you may want to leave out a few others that you do not need. What is the length requirement for Flagler? Your voice is here, but I do think you can knock out a few of those adjectives and allow yourself to show the reader your accomplishments as opposed to telling them about your accomplishments. It does work as it is, but a tad of revision may make it even stronger. Nice work overall. - mrs. elmeer
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